I’m not a stranger to waiting.
It was during our wait for Sam when I realized much of life is spent waiting. It is typical to be waiting for something. We wait for appointments and cashiers and packages. We wait for vacations and weekends and holidays. We wait for tests to be over. We wait for family — wanting them to arrive, saying good-bye as they leave, hoping they come back.
Life is filled with waiting.
Perhaps the living isn’t so much in the events, but in the wait. As we’ve walked this unconventional path of building a family, we’ve learned to embrace the wait. We’ve learned there is goodness even in the midst of the heartache that too often comes with waiting. We’ve learned waiting doesn’t have to wilt us.
We were praying for our new child to be part of our family before Christmas. It would have been a miracle. I’d given up this hope the week before Christmas. It was too soon and too big to expect a child for Christmas. I have such little faith.
It was here, when I began to doubt, began to wonder who am I to pray such a big prayer of a miracle of family in such a short time frame, when we received the call — matched with a seven year old boy. See, I have such little faith.
We are waiting while our son continues to live without us, and we live without him.
In a wait, it is easy to wish for something else. To wish for paperwork to have been filed or for the system to be more efficient. It is easy to be impatient.
Instead, we choose to accept the wait. There are all kinds of ways to wait. With each adoption, we’ve had different waits. Perhaps after trying all of the wrong waiting ways, it is easier to chose this one. Right now we are waiting with sweet anticipation.
This is faith. It is a matter of embracing the unknown, accepting the plans that don’t go as I want, and trusting this is all an important pat of the journey. There is purpose in the wait. I might not know what the purpose is, but I trust it is there. Perhaps my faith is growing a bit.
Soon, in a perfectly orchestrated timeline, we will have our son home. Until then, we chose to wait with joy.
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