courage (soLs)

The greatest test of courage on the earth is to bear defeat without Losing heart.
R. G. Ingersoll
Spirit is a fragile thing. Mine is strong and fresh in the morning. The day wears on it, rubbing it, thinning it, scrapping it until it is merely threads. I get in my car and begin the restoration.
I drive in silence, listening to the hum of tires on the road. I clear my mind of the poison. Thoughts that question my worth, my beliefs, my ability. I breathe deep and remember. Choice is essential to growing readers. Writing words matters to making sense of the world. Conferring at the point of need changes lives. I massage these things into my spirit.
Slowly it thickens. 
At home my kids hug me. Andy kisses my forehead. I create in the kitchen, and we sit around the table, eating, talking, giggling. Family life swirls and wraps around my spirit.
It becomes whole.
Bedtime prayers and books slow down the day. I’m at my computer, and Andy sits across the room. My fingers tippy-tap around the keyboard. I write. Words. Sentences. Poems. Articles. Chapters. Books.
My spirit is restored.

5 Comments »

  1. You know that voice you hear in the car, the one that repeats what you know to be good and right about teaching? The one that massages goodness back into your spirit?

    Well, that is the voice you share with us. That is exactly what your voice does for our spirits.

    So happy to hear you are surrounded with your own goodness and the goodness of your family to heal your spirit tonight. Maybe some writerly feedback will even cause your spirit to swell with goodness by morning!

  2. Brilliantly beautiful, Ruth. I saw my own heart in your piece while reading tonight. I loved its simplicity and how well chosen verbs carried your reflection. I'm thankful that each evening you are restored because just like Christy offered — your voice does the same for ours. Best…

  3. Oh, I was thinking just what Christy wrote. You are the one who massages all those good thoughts, pushes encouragement through your words that is sprinkled with reminders of the power stories. Thank you for your sharing your need for courage and sharing that you are human too! (Hey, sometimes I wonder . . . ) 🙂

  4. Nice to put the doubts out there for the audience, then also share the good ending, family and home. It's a lovely recording of a real slice of our lives, Ruth, something to share with friends. I appreciate it.