2012: Steph Timeline


Age: 8

Major Events:

  • I consider 2012 my personal year of healing. There were so many parts of me I had lost being Stephanie’s mom, and this was the year I reclaimed many things. I began cooking again, with fresh food. Exercise became daily. I took a water aerobics class, and remembered why I loved it. I dropped so many sizes. Most importantly, I reestablished my habit of daily scripture reading and I began journaling every morning about faith.
  • I started laughing again. I just remembered that this was very upsetting to Stephanie. In a few years, Stephanie would tell one of the therapists that the thing she hated most about me is I like to laugh. She said it just that way, “I hate my mom because she likes to laugh. She acts like it’s okay to laugh even when people have hard times. She just acts like life if perfect and happy, and she laughs when things are funny. I hate that. I hate her for laughing.”
  • Stephanie was in lots of sports. She had basketball cupcakes for her birthday.
  • Family and friends were in abundance. They wrapped warm hugs around Stephanie and had ridiculous grace.
  • Karianne ended her exchange year with her family coming to visit. It was a lovely way for Stephanie to see and experience the way families can love one another and be forever, even if they meet later in life.

We thought 2012 was a turning point and things were going to be okay.

See all of Stephanie Timeline posts here.


  1. Ruth, I had no idea you had this experience. WOW! You have always been so together and calm; something I took completely for granted. I think I would have literally fallen apart.
    Since I have known you, I have admired your willingness to take on what I considered big, difficult things. I had not idea you had this gargantuan thing going on in the background.
    Now I think you are have super powers. What an amazing woman! Keep writing, and encouraging us to put ourselves out there with our stories, too. You make me brave about that. I didn’t think anyone could.

    • Oh Jill! Thank you for letting me know. I think writing always gives more than it takes. This timeline project has been a tough one, but I am so grateful (& relieved) to see themes of faith, hope & love emerge.

      Maybe you’ll join us on Thursdays at Sharing Our Stories? Here’s the link: http://www.sharingourstoriesmagic.com

  2. I’m glad you had this year of healing for you, Ruth, a strengthening for what was to come. Remember when someone lashes out, like Steph about the laughing, I often believe they do so to share feelings, but choose the very safest person for that lashing. This time, it was you. Moving into adolescence must have made everything harder. I’m sad for this turning for all of your sakes.

    • Linda, your comments are such gifts to me. I treasure your perspective. Thank you. Hugs, Ruth