2020: Steph Timeline


Age: 16
Major Events: Moved to a group home (in the midst of a global pandemic and a state-wide stay-at-home order)

Stephanie has been given another opportunity at a group home. It is a luxury placement and we are hopeful that with maturity she now has the capacity to live in a family setting. Group homes help children learn to live within a family environment. At this group home, the adults in the house are called Family Teachers. Their role is to teach residents how to live in a family.

There is an onsite school, as well as an opportunity to attend public school. The therapy is rooted in DBT, which is a good fit for Stephanie.

It is so difficult for her to live in relationship with others. They are working with Stephanie on:

  • Accepting feedback and consequences.
  • Following instructions.
  • Accepting decisions.
  • Waiting to express feelings and disagreeing appropriately rather than having the last word in the moment.

This is a familiar list and one that we have been working on since we adopted her.

Our first impression is the philosophy of this placement mirrors ours when it comes to family life and the way to live in relationship with others. They seem to value looking at the person a  child can become, rather than judging on the past. We hope Stephanie has the capability to accept the norms and responsibilities of a more independent way of life.


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    • Thanks Mary Helen! Stephanie’s story is one of learning grief & relief often coexist!

  1. I am grateful that Stephanie has earned another chance to learn, Ruth. Thank you for sharing how she’s doing. I think of her often, and send best wishes for her and to all of you during this challenging time.

  2. I know your heart aches at the twists and turns Stephanie has had in life. I pray that this is a new path that she can accept and follow.

  3. I’ve been reading all the timeline posts that you’ve written so far. So grateful that Stephanie has this new opportunity. Prayers that it will be successful and that she will continue to progress. This morning I was listening to a live chat on Instagram. I wrote down this quote and thought of you and this timeline project: “Healing, celebrating and learning come from telling our stories.” Thanks for the courage to tell your story. Hugs and prayers, Ruth!